


don't embarrass yourself

by legosholdinghands



Series: i can tell that we are gonna be friends [1]
Category: Lego Ninjago
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Kinda maybe?, Slight swearing, Unintentional Ableism, and jay is a douche, autism not explicit btw, for a while, zane is autistic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:42:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27073672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/legosholdinghands/pseuds/legosholdinghands
Summary: A few months had passed since Wu interrupted some petty argument about high scores and cheating and dropped the stoic blond off like a new puppy, with a firm, but gentle, “Make your new teammate feel welcome.”Cole seemed pretty optimistic in the beginning (or maybe he just thought the new guy was cute, Jay wasn’t sure), but he was… less so. He might have thought it was just because he hadn’t anticipated a new teammate coming into the picture in the first place, but that wasn’t the issue. The dude was weird, plain and simple. Cole had scolded him for saying that in the beginning, but since then even he’d grown to agree.
Relationships: Cole & Jay Walker & Zane, Cole & Zane (Ninjago), Jay Walker & Zane
Series: i can tell that we are gonna be friends [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1975939
Comments: 19
Kudos: 60





	don't embarrass yourself

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this in like 30 minutes a week ago and i don’t even know what to title it but it’s the first of a little bitty series centered on the concept of zane and laughter because??? idk im a simp??? and i’m depressed??? jay stans yall might not love this because he’s a real trashfire of a human being at the beginning. anyway yah this isn’t my best writing but it’s self indulgent asf and here in the ninjago fandom that’s our trademark so have fun

“But… how can you _tell_ if it’s a joke?” Zane’s legs were folded studiously beneath him, confused expression made visible by the harsh light of his bedside lamp.

An exasperated sigh dragged itself out of Jay (he wasn’t even being dramatic anymore, that’s how bad it was) and he turned half-heartedly to face the other boy from his bed. “I don’t know man, you just do.” After the fifth or sixth or  _ millionth _ time he’d grown accustomed to letting the words tumble out of his mouth in tired recitation. 

A few months had passed since Wu interrupted some petty argument about high scores and cheating and dropped the stoic blond off like a new puppy, with a firm, but gentle, “Make your new teammate feel welcome.” Cole seemed pretty optimistic in the beginning (or maybe he just thought the new guy was cute, Jay wasn’t sure), but he was… less so. He might have thought it was just because he hadn’t anticipated a new teammate coming into the picture in the first place, but that wasn’t the issue. The dude was  _ weird _ , plain and simple. Cole had scolded him for saying that in the beginning, but since then even he’d grown to agree.

Jay didn’t consider himself one to judge (his eyebrow scar and plump figure had earned him far too many unwanted comments for that), but from the beginning even Zane’s  _ looks _ had put him off. He stood barely any shorter than Cole, maybe two or three inches, and Cole was  _ huge. _ More than once Jay had only half-jokingly compared him to a barrel or a tank or sasquatch’s mountain-climbing gay cousin. But unlike Cole, Zane’s frame was notably slim, maybe even a little too much so. His clothes hung easily off his slender waist and his long legs gave his motions and almost graceful quality even beneath his plain, modest garments. He had the type of face that could have aged him at fifteen or twenty depending on the angle you looked at it from.

He just looked… fake? No, not fake. Just… not normal. Like a regular person but a little too smoothed out, like a mannequin, a feature which was only exacerbated by his perpetually calm expression and soft, even voice. Jay hadn’t seen his skin break out  _ once  _ even with all the patrols and hot days spent working outside, which was just plain unfair, so either he had the genetic makeup of a supermodel or a skin routine fit for one. He looked like if God grabbed a fairly average joe, ran him through a taffy machine, then subsequently lobotomized every part of the human brain that would give him the ability to act like a normal human being. 

And his  _ eyes- _

“Jay?” Zane eyed him questioningly from across the room. 

Jay didn’t have any preconceived notions about seers or what they could do - didn’t know much about seers at all except that they were ridiculously rare. But Zane creeped him out just enough that every time he caught him staring he half-expected the dude to turn into a Hollywood demon and start crawling across the ceiling or something.

Zane apparently interpreted Jay’s silence as an invitation to continue.

“I mean  _ how _ do you know?”

Jay groaned. At this point he might actually prefer death at the hands of Zane’s hypothetical demonic wrath. “You just… I don’t know! What do you want from me? An instruction manual?”

Zane blinked. “Yes.”

Plopping his face in his pillow, Jay grumbled, “Sarcasm, bud.”

“Oh. Can you explain that instead?”

“I already have! Like, ten times!”

“I still don’t understand.”

“Yeah, clearly.” If it wasn’t for the scrunch in his brows or the barely-there dip of his mouth, Jay would be convinced that it was all for show, like some clandestine joke that only Zane was in on. It was unbelievable that someone could be so dense and so clinical at the same time. In his opinion, he deserved an award for putting up with it all. The obliviousness, the weird questions, the  _ complete and utter lack of boundaries. _

Pointedly, he flopped back over and tried to fall asleep, hoping that for once - just  _ once _ \- Zane would take the hint and follow suit, but without even glancing up he could feel those watchful eyes on his back, waiting expectantly. Finally he trudged himself up onto his elbows and turned. At the motion Zane looked ready to ask a new question, but seemed to think better of it at Jay’s tired scowl and snapped his mouth shut. Good. At least he’d picked up on  _ some _ social cues. 

“Okay, listen. I’m gonna let you in on something.” he started. Really, he was helping the poor guy. He just wasn’t ever going to get it, and once he realized that he’d be a lot better off. “If you keep… going around the way you are and thinking you’re gonna, like… I don’t know, pick up on this stuff and then people are gonna like you? You’re going to humiliate yourself. Me and Cole, we’re pretty chill, but not everyone is gonna be able to put up with, uh,” rolling back over onto his back, he closed his eyes and waved vaguely at Zane’s person, as if the gesture would help get the point across. “All of that.”

It took a few seconds for Zane to reply. “Humiliate myself?”

“Yeah. Since you’re… you know.”

“Since I’m what?” 

Jay briefly reopened his eyes to peer over where Zane was leaning forward, practically halfway off of his bed. He sighed and closed them again. “Don’t worry about it. Just - you’re not the type of guy that people want to hang with, trust me. It’s honestly sad having to listen to you try to talk to people. And no one else will say it to your face, but  _ I _ will because I don’t want you to go out and embarrass yourself any more than you already do. Nobody ever says, ‘oh, I hope Zane shows up’ or ‘oh, that Zane guy is really fun’. Has anyone ever said that?” 

Silence.

“Have they?”

“No.” Zane murmured.

“Well, there you have it.”

He turned back around to face away and pulled his covers up, waiting for one of the routine  _ “I don’t understand” _ or  _ “Can you please clarify -?” _ responses, but there was nothing. 

A couple minutes passed and he heard a faint  _ click _ as the lamp was switched off, leaving the room encased in darkness, and some brief rustling as the other boy retreated under his own covers. Jay waited a little longer, just to be sure, but Zane didn’t say a thing. 

One more minute, 

then two, 

then three, 

then ten. 

Nothing but soft breathing and the occasional gust of wind beating against the window like a cold beggar. He tried to relax, but it was like the indifference he’d felt before had vanished, replaced by a feeling of unease and restlessness and - and - 

\- guilt, not that he had anything to feel  _ guilty _ for, he was just being  _ honest _ and there wasn’t anything wrong with that. 

A pit had formed in his stomach and he couldn’t quite tell why and  _ why was he nauseous? _

Jay was usually a pretty easy sleeper but he was sure that night it took ages to drift off, and only a short while later he woke up feeling bitterly perturbed, hair damp and frizzed from running his hands through it, throat uncomfortably dry and scratchy, like someone had dragged him through a thunderstorm and then chucked him in with the laundry to dry off. 

That morning Jay dragged a forkful of sausage through the extra syrup drying on the edge of his plate. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched Zane quietly pick through his own food, slicing everything into little pieces and lazily plucking them up one by one and chatting with Cole, who was either too tired to notice the lingering unease or too tired to care.

Zane hardly said more than a few words at a time, just nodding and humming and offering a pleased “you’re welcome” when Cole thanked him for the food.

It felt…  _ wrong. _ Jay found himself missing the odd little questions and that clumsy faux laugh Zane always piped up with when he could tell someone was making a joke but didn’t quite understand what it meant. He waited, hoping the blond was just tired and would soon chime in with some offbeat little comment about the weather or birds or Cole’s bedhead and they’d all laugh and Zane would just look confused -

(and maybe a little hurt)

_ (he always did look a little hurt, didn’t he?)  _

_ (When they laughed) _

\- and everything would go back to normal and Jay wouldn’t have to keep sitting here feeling like the world’s biggest asshole just because he said one thing that was maybe a little bit out of line.

But breakfast passed in a relative quiet, 

then training,

then lunch,

dinner,

night,

then the next morning,

and the next,

and the next,

and the next,

until Jay had almost forgotten what Zane looked like when he smiled.

Zane never asked him for help with a joke again.


End file.
